A "friendly" date between Tommy and the widow of his dead cousin takes a unexpected turn when she makes a move on Tommy. Franco's ex-girlfriend shows up at the firehouse and claims he's the father of her five-year-old daughter, turning his life upside down.

Williams discovers the Nation of Islam and sets about changing her ways, as well as the ways of several other Deputies.

Guest: Tom Cruise (Collateral)

Segments: Porter Goss Appointed as Head of CIA

Las Vegas Police Reportedly Ignored Warning by FBI About Al-Qaeda Being in Town

Ed Helms (Republicans Try To Get Nader On Ballot to Help Bush)

This Week in God w Stephen Colbert (Pope Releases Negative Document on Feminism, Mecca Cola on Shelves, Chris Noth Named Unofficial Tourism Ambassador)